Another year older

I had a wonderful birthday! My boys went all out! Yesterday was a sweet reminder of all the blessings in my life. My boys are growing up so fast. I remember thinking when I was pregnant with both boys how old I would be when they were grown. Well…Zach just turned 20, and here I am all the way in the future! It went so fast. One day you are putting your sweet sleeping baby down for a nap the next they are grown. Every season is Fantastic in its own way. So enjoy them all! Because the next time you open your eyes your that much older! I want to say wiser, but…

ChChChChanges

Everyone is full of advice when you are having babies. They are all smiles and jokes about never sleeping again.  Your life will never be the same, they joke, and they are right! Babies are wonderful and magical and you will lose A LOT of sleep. Its a fantastic time!

However… no one tells you that they grow up so fast. It seems we just brought Zach home. He was all of 4lbs, so tiny and sweet, and now he is graduating. It’s an exciting and happy time, but Momma’s, it’s also a hard time. He is so excited about life, but when he talks about life, Mom is not the center. He talks about his own home, his future job, and wife and kids, and dreams. Its so fun to hear, but I know my role has changed. I am no longer his person. You know what I mean? When they are little the whole world revolves around Mom! It is full of Mom! Look what I did! and Mom! come see this! For a brief, brief moment you have all of their attention.

You see in truth you feel for that brief moment you have control, and lets face it, we take some comfort in that. In truth we never had, I never had any control. But… man, I liked the illusion of it.

It seems my whole life has been a lesson in letting go and letting God. I fight so hard to be in control, only to re-learn I never had any to begin with. In the moments that I let my guard down, I realize what a blessing it is to not be in control.

Why do I fight so hard?

I don’t know. All I do know is that the Lord has always and will always love Zach better than me. So in this season of happy and hard, I will sing, and praise my savior. For He knows the way is hard, and he knows my Momma heart is hurting, and bursting with pride at the same time.

I don’t know what season you are in, but I  don’t have to. God does, trust Him, even through your season of joyfully hard…..

Parenting

 I know what you’re thinking,

thats a touchy subject,

tread lightly,

you, are going to upset someone!

You are probably right, but I just can’t hold it in!

I think we, as a society, have forgotten that as the adult( assuming you are an adult) you are in charge. Not the children.

I know that if I get up late, lay around, watch TV, read‘, or whatever else I want to do all day, my children will do the same thing. WHATEVER THEY WANT TO DO!

I can not run my house that way. You could not run a  successful business this way. (Although I know people who try)

How much more should I want to have a peaceful, successfully ran home? Children who know boundaries, how to work hard, how to play hard, to be respectful, and how to obey! 

GASP!

I know, I said the word OBEY! It has become a bad word. No one makes their children obey. After all you may damage their fragile self esteem, or worse,  they may turn out to be productive adults!

It is maddening to me to see all these children with no sense of right or wrong, no respect for persons or property. They do what they want,when they want, and if you stand in the way of that they throw a fit. 

To borrow a phrase from a friend,

“Mean Mommies of the world unite! “

Take back your authority, invest in your children, let them be mad at you. Thats how they grow. Its how they learn. Its your job. You are never to busy to be their Mom. 

Now before you get all upset, I do not claim to have parenting all figured out. I’m sure my children will have their own special set of counseling issues to work thru! But I do know this much, my letting them run wild, will not in any way help shape them into Godly young men. They will not become the leaders of tomorrow if they don’t see the hard work involved in leading today. 

I want my kids to feel secure, to be happy, to have wonderful memories of childhood. That means I have to be involved, and sometimes I have to say no, and if they throw a fit, then there will be consequences. You see, I am in charge of this little hacienda. 

If it helps you.. look at it like this

Dad- CEO

Mom-Manager

children- minions!

You are raising future adults. I am raising future adults. If they can’t obey you, will they be able to get along in the work place later. Are you raising confident children? Do they truly know what they are capable of, or do they only think of themselves? 

Dean and I often talk of what we need to do differently,tweak our parenting, and re-evaluate. Why? Because if I get my children to adulthood, but have disrespectful brats, then I have failed. We have failed. My whole lives work will have been for not. 

So it is with much prayer, and hard work, I set out everyday to raise my children. I know it is the same for many of you. 

I know that most people who read this are wonderful parents, so please do not be offended. I have, a few , no one in particular  in mind as I  write this!

 

Have a wonderful day!